Some Combinations Are Just Toxic


Life has taught this truth

Nature keeps reiterating it

Science can attest to it


Water and ethanol are perfectly miscible together. That, however, is not true of water and vinegar. No matter how long or how hard you shake the containing vessel, the two liquids will still separate once they are settled because they can’t just mix together. Water on its own is certainly amazing and purposeful. Vinegar is also very useful. They both couldn’t combine together not because they are useless but because the combination naturally can’t be.

In chemistry, potassium is a very useful metal and water a much needed solvent. The combination of the two, however, is very explosive and dangerous.

The same goes in our relationships. Some relationship pairing are just harmful to the individuals involved and sometimes, the harm extends to their loved ones. This is not because the people involved are so flawed and damaged but because the combination cannot just work. The more you try to make it work, the more it proves futile and the more it frustrates you leaving you feeling miserable. Every relationship we keep, platonic or intimate, influences us. Some people bring to light our hidden strengths, some bring out the best in us and some bring out the worst in us – Most times, they can’t explain why or how they do it.

I will share with you this story a friend shared with me that inspired this post.

I fell in love with this guy and it led to a relationship that lasted for almost 2 years. I loved him and I still love him, more than words can fully express but it seemed like that love was a poison to us both. It was like we both can’t help but bring out the monster in each other. My temper skyrockets almost every single day and I found myself doing things I normally would have doubted I could do. But we did love each other fiercely yet we can’t be together without hurting each other. As things deteriorated for the worst so fast, I had to make a decision. The hardest decision of my life. I had to call it quit. I didn’t feel relief after making that decision. I thought I would but I didn’t. My feelings betrayed me. The only thing I had to reassure me that I made the right decision was a deep conviction within me…

Love is patient. Love is enduring but love is also SELFLESS and SACRIFICING. Love knows when to LET GO. Not all love stories are smooth and sweet. Some are rocky. Some are chaotic. Some even seem TOXIC. That is a reality of life. Love is about putting another’s feeling most times before yours. Sometimes, love requires you to sacrifice what will satisfy you for the benefit of the other. A relationship that pushes each other to extreme ends and brings to light the worst in them is definitely toxic. It may not be that the individuals involved are irredeemable. It may be that they both need some growing to do or they may need some time and space to work out some personal issues plaguing them. They may have some addictions or habits to deal with before pairing again. Or it may be that their combination can never work. MOVE ON! It will definitely take time. It will hurt like hell. It may depress you. But MOVE ON!

Some people remain adamant to this truth and they keep pushing and trying till they both hit rock bottom and cause a damage that cannot be undone. Know when to let go!

Courage does not always mean war. Sometimes. It is the quiet voice at the END OF THE ROAD saying “I will try again tomorrow”- LONIXE

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